One Part Carrie Bradshaw, Two Parts 16 Candles

Last night I slept with my MacBook. Hm. Bet you were not expecting that one. Let’s just say MacBook makes a poor “big spoon,” but I didn’t want Mr. MacBook Pro in bed with me to keep me company through the dark and lonely night. Pffft, so over that.

Really, I wanted to wake up next to a computer so that I could check the Branford Patch this morning as soon as I opened my eyes. I woke up around 8 (not bad on a Sunday morning) and sure enough, my column was published!

I immediately emailed, Tweeted, and Facebooked about it. Then, I waited for all of my friends to wake up and read it.

It was surreal.

As the day progressed, various friends left little encouraging comments on the article. Some posted it to their facebook walls. Others called/emailed me about it. I do have the world’s best friends.  One of my favorite comments came from another “Patch Person,” Victorianna Adinolfi. She said: “Couples from Kay jewelers commercials ride unicorns to work. Nice to see someone taking a little pride in being real. Definitely looking forward to more of this column.”

I love it. Because 1. I want to ride a unicorn to work and 2. I’m feeling like if any guy bought me something from “Kay Jewelers” I would have to throw a martini in his face for trying to buy my love without even knowing me! I don’t like new jewelry. I like old jewelry with a story to it.

Honestly, I probably wouldn’t ever throw a martini in a guy’s face (but seriously, I’m dying to do it). But it would have to be for something good. Not like buying me jewelry because I can’t be that shallow – I tried.

Once, the Ex brought me a tiny heart-shaped emerald necklace once and he was so proud of himself for finding an emerald that had been created in a lab. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that lab-created gems are not as “precious” as naturally occurring ones (and that’s why they are so freaking cheap). Instead, I told him how beautiful and perfectly structured it was and wore the necklace every day, because I loved him, so I loved the necklace – eh, until I mailed it back to him after le Epic Breakup.

Thank God for that break-up. If it wasn’t for my subsequent neurotic quest to find the man who will tattoo my name on his soul, vice his chest, I wouldn’t have this awesome rockstar opportunity to write for The Patch.

I’m so excited about this column. I feel like all of the slumber parties at friends’ houses watching Sex and the City (I wasn’t allowed to watch it at my house and no way would my parents spring for HBO) are finally paying off! Of course, I’m much closer to being Molly Ringwald in 16 Candles than I am to Sarah Jessica Parker in SATC, but maybe that’s part of my charm?

In the end, it’s much more likely for me to say something like “I can’t believe I gave my panties to a geek.” (Samantha, 16 Candles) than “I’ve spent $40,000 on shoes and I have no place to live?” (Carrie, Sex and the City).  However, that’s really because I don’t have $40,000 to spend on shoes. But, I am sitting on a sofa that cost less than my last pair of sunglasses did, so maybe there’s more “Fabulous Carrie” in me than I would initially guess….

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About ermodi

i like champagne and nachos. i watch people’s mouths move when they talk to me and judge if they are a good kisser i like to write with fine-tip Sharpies because i think it makes me look confident i bite my nails i think doing the dishes is a very lonely chore i think “autumn” is the prettiest word in the English language. i believe in love – or, at least something that resembles love, but i don’t trust this idea of forever.
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One Response to One Part Carrie Bradshaw, Two Parts 16 Candles

  1. T says:

    I dont think I could ever throw a martini in a man’s face – what a waste of alcohol!!!

    Your patch article was trés magnifique! (I think your beret inspired that one). Can’t wait till the next one posts!!

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