Domestica

Did you know there was a website called www.howtobakeapotato.com ?

Can you believe I found it one night because I seriously didn’t know how to bake a potato and was looking for instructions on the Internet?

AND CAN YOU BELIEVE IT TAKES AN HOUR TO BAKE A POTATO!?

CRAZY!

Now, contrary to the accusations of various ex-love interests and my friend Nicole, I have always considered myself to be quite a Domestic Diva. I think I have a real knack for cooking – and recently developed the ability to clean up after myself (not just use the “stuff and hide and sanitize” technique of my messy past.)

Seriously, I am 27 now. I might be living with my mom, but I am still a real grown up. I pay taxes and do occasional laundry. I cry at sentimental movies and use an anti-aging cream on my face at night. I am good at being all womanly.

Still, my potato crisis had me seriously questioning my culinary skill.

If I didn’t know how to bake a potato, did that make me a failure of sorts?

I would argue to the contrary;  I may actually have some natural inclination toward cooking, displaying an intrinsic understanding of certain flavors that go together – think Beethoven and the piano except for with mixing food stuffs – but admittedly, I am missing a few of the basic steps.

I can invent a great cheese dip – MacGyver style with only what’s in my kitchen – and bake it in a bell pepper.

I can make my own pasta and infuse it with spinach or carrot puree.

Brownies from scratch? No problem!

I’m the queen of pancakes – dulce de leche and apple pancakes, cinnamon granola spice pancakes, marion berry and white chocolate pancakes, nutella-banana-nut pancakes – and I’m just getting started! I make authentico fish tacos and guacamole – my own fresh salsa and tortillas.

I love making cupcakes – I just hate scooping the batter neatly into the cups and then letting them cool and frosting them. Usually, I’m running late, and I frost them in the pan, right after I pull them out of the oven and rush them to the party with hot mitts on.

Look at me!  A modern day Betty Crocker!

But I have to search the internet for instructions on baking a potato!? It doesn’t make sense!

I think I just started to fly around the kitchen before I learned how to crawl. I just got ahead of myself. Unfortunately, I might be at the point where it is just too boring to learn the basics of cooking – trivial things like how to make meatloaf or what exactly goes into Shepard’s Pie or how to bake beans to make them “baked beans,” just don’t appeal to me, I never learned how to do it and don’t have the attention span to do so now. I’m too far past it.

Just like the 16 cook books I have – I find them quite useful in adding color to my counter top, but haven’t even cracked the bindings in some of them!

Now, I am not opposed to looking through cookbooks for inspiration and pretty pictures, but can’t bring myself to actually follow them. I think it’s because I hate being told what to do just as much as I hate being told how to do something! Which is probably why I didn’t last too long in the military….

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About ermodi

i like champagne and nachos. i watch people’s mouths move when they talk to me and judge if they are a good kisser i like to write with fine-tip Sharpies because i think it makes me look confident i bite my nails i think doing the dishes is a very lonely chore i think “autumn” is the prettiest word in the English language. i believe in love – or, at least something that resembles love, but i don’t trust this idea of forever.
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3 Responses to Domestica

  1. The one who gave you a cookbook says:

    Open the damn cookbook!

    Lol JK! You are a menu inspired person, you know that flavor profiles can be wonderful and eccentric, all a cookbook will help you do is figure out HOW to cook something beyond your normal repertoire.

    No matter how you slice it, the cookbook is NOT ordering you around. Just giving you the steps to help you complete the experiment successfully and safely.

  2. Pingback: Moonstruck - notme2night.com

  3. Mel says:

    Just FYI – it diesn’t take an hour. Rub some olive oil on a baked or sweet potato, set it on a plate, pop it in the microwave for 3-4 min (depending on size), roll it over, pop it in for another 3-5 min, take it out with hot mitts & roll it in aluminum foil, let sit for 2-5 min to finish steaming. Best lunch ever!

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