Because I just signed up for FarmersOnly.com
And, as T was kind enough to point out to me, I’m “not a farmer.”
Nope, not even close to being a farmer. However, I am close to many farmers now that I’m back in Colorado, so who cares if I’m going to be going to school in Denver this fall? There’s gotta be a little niche for a city girl like me on FarmersOnly, right?
Since I swore off online dating a year ago, I put minimal effort into my online profile. However, I still employed great strategy. I wrote:
I just got out of the Coast Guard and am getting ready to Vet Tech school in Denver this fall. I love animals, open spaces, pick up trucks and learning new things. I recently learned how to milk a goat. I am not very good at it.
I strategically mentioned the Coast Guard because lots of country music songs are very patriotic, so I figured lots of farmers would dig my military background. Plus, I think it makes me sound kinda “blue collar.”
I strategically mentioned Vet Tech school because I’m really excited about it and I want farmers to know that an investment in me is kinda like an investment in their livestock…sorta…
I strategically mentioned Denver because we all know everyone in Colorado is a cowboy.
I strategically mentioned how much I love everything about farms: animals, open spaces, pick up trucks. That’s about all I know about farms, anyway. I could have mentioned “waking up at dawn for a full day of backbreaking work,” but I thought that might be a little cliche.
I strategically mentioned learning new things because any city girl like me would have a lot to learn on a farm. I also backed that up with an example of something new I learned: how to milk a goat and showed my humility/need for a guiding large calloused hand to show me the way.
Honestly, it’s one of my best dating profiles ever. If this doesn’t work, I don’t know what will!
I even made my profile picture one of me holding a baby goat because it shows that I’m serious about farm animals, I am nurturing AND everyone knows goats symbolize fertility.